Faith, Love and Submission

Good morning dear readers. I know I've written a few entries on submission, but I feel this is one of those topics that really needs to be covered. We have heard so much, both negative and positive, recently that this has become a real "hot-button" issue. I could write on this topic for days at a time. It is such a controversial topic (and anyone who knows me knows I love to get up on my soap box and argue a point!). 

I've read many well-written articles on this topic and I would like to share them here with you. I hope that after reading these, it will give you something to think about.

Here's one where just the title could spark an argument! http://www.rosilindjukic.com/2013/08/submissive-obedience.html

This post gives some insight into common myths and asks some good questions. http://www.girlsgonewise.com/7-misconceptions-about-submission/

This one is from one of my favorite magazines. It gives clear, concise information on the topic.
http://www.todayschristianwoman.com/articles/2008/september/whats-so-scary-about-submission.html

Here is my response to Rosilind Jukic's article:
"A very thought provoking blog entry. As women,we reject the notion of submission. Somehow we feel it equals doormat, "giving in", weak-willed, and any other negative connotation of that word. Yes, women fought for freedom. But how far have we taken that freedom? "I can do anything you can do, and do it better" has become the catch phrase for women. I believe this is part of the reason why our society has become so messed up. We have completely lost sight of home, family and faith. Today's women are focused on career, material possessions and looking younger. We have totally negated the role of men in our society. We have relegated them to where women were 30+ years ago. We have taken away their authority and their role as provider and protector. We need to get back to our core values. We need to redefine the roles in our society. 

It's great that women are strong and that we are empowered to do whatever we set our minds to. This is not always a bad thing. When it turns into a bad thing is when we use it to usurp men's authority over us. It's funny how you described how men are viewed today. I heard that exact same description yesterday on the radio (I listen to a Christian station..K-Love). I believe there is a new ad on tv I believe that mentions what you described and they were talking about it yesterday.

Men, in general, are being given a bad rap. Not ALL men are beer guzzling, "whipped", pot-bellied do-nothings. Just like women aren't weak, dumb, no-nothings. Or on the other end of the spectrum, men view strong women as "dykes" or someone to be afraid of. How many times have we heard men jokingly say "Don't tell my wife..." Men shouldn't be afraid of their wives, or afraid of their reactions to things (unless they really are doing something wrong/sinful/not of God).

There's nothing inherently wrong with being a strong woman. It takes a strong woman to submit herself to God and her husband. That takes strength and courage. It forces us to step out of the "norm" and go against the grain. Not an easy thing to do in this society. I don't know how many ladies I've talked to about this topic and basically got the same response. "I don't know why you want to be told what to do." or "I would NEVER submit myself to a man." or "Well, if you like that sort of thing..." Some people will even believe that it is abusive.

Yes, there can be a point when something like that CAN be abusive. Especially if the man isn't being led by God. There are men who will take advantage of a woman who is submissive. They feel they can do whatever they want without any say so from their wife. There is such a fine line that can be easily crossed. Especially if God is not at the center of the relationship.

I hope women today will take heart. I'm hoping more and more women will be like us and want to serve their husbands as they serve the Lord. I really am happy to see more and more Christian women following this." 

The one thing you really need to keep in mind with all of this is..Is your husband submitting to God? Is he capable of leading your family in a Christian way? Do you and/or your husband have a preconceived notion about what submission is (secular vs Christian)? What is your relationship with Christ? What is your marriage, at this point, like?

As I mentioned previously, there can be such a fine line between biblical submission and abuse. That's why I asked about the preconceived notions. A lot of what we have heard on this topic lately seems to be the negative, secular connotation thanks in part to books like "50 Shades of Gray". It gives the impression that we are to be used, abused, and just "go with the flow", that our thoughts and feelings really don't matter a whit.

But then there are women like Candace Cameron Bure who have stepped into mainstream media and admitted that she has chosen to submit to her husband as it is written in the bible. When I googled "Candace Cameron Bure and biblical submission" oh my.... almost every article I came across was totally against what she was trying to say. Almost every article says she's wrong, she's reading it in the literal sense and not in 21st century interpretation, so on and so forth. This is what women today who chose this are subjected to. IMHO, I find this demeaning both as a woman and as a Christian. It makes it seem like we live in some fantasy world and are so weak-willed that we give in to our "manly" husbands who just make decisions arbitrarily and tell us we are to follow. End of story. Oh, humble readers, how wrong that is. Matthew 5:10-12 tells us we are blessed when we are persecuted:
"Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great; for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you."

Here is a quote from blogger Sarah Bessey. This pretty much sums up the secular worlds' opinion:
"The idea that a Man is the Head of the Home has its roots in secular ancient culture, not in the Word of God or the created order of humanity. And the idea that, as a wife, I would need to “become passive” or smaller or somehow less in order to make my marriage work is damaging and wrong." (http://sarahbessey.com/disagree-bure-biblical-marriage/)

We are to make ourselves smaller or less, that we are to "become passive"? Where exactly does it say that in the bible? I found Matthew Henry's Commentary on this topic. The page goes through all of Ephesians 5, but it's worth a look: http://biblehub.com/commentaries/mhc/ephesians/5.htm

Biblehub also gave me a listing of all the passages in the bible that refer to women being submissive:
Esther 1:20; Esther 1:22; Colossians 3:18; Titus 2:5 (this passage gives a good definition of being meek); 1 Peter 3:1; Ephesians 5:22 NIV. Jamieson-Fausset-Brown Bible Commentary gives a great description of submission and what it means. I'm sure if you set about thumbing through your bible you will find even more passages on this topic. 

I will leave you, dear readers, with this final link. This goes down to the nitty-gritty, biblical, grammatical derivation of the word submission and it's interpretation. 
http://coveringandauthority.com/covering-and-apostolic-authority/difficult-questions-about-covering-and-authority/biblical-submission/

I hope I have given you some more insight into this topic. I hope you will take it to heart. Pray about it. Seek scripture about it. Let the Lord lead you to wherever it is He wants you to go.

Much Love and God Bless.

Good Morning Girls Devotional Week 7: Our Ministries Tues 3/11/14

Today's reading takes into Proverbs 31, which most of us women strive to be. It is not an unrealistic goal. You can be that way! Just do it a step at a time.
 Read: Proverbs 31:26-28
 Her mouth is full of wisdom;
    kindly teaching is on her tongue. She is vigilant over the activities of her household; she doesn’t eat the food of laziness. Her children bless her; her husband praises her.

S: Proverbs 31:27
She is vigilant over the activities of her household; she doesn’t eat the food of laziness.

O: As wives and mothers oh how vigilant we are!! We watch over our children, our husbands. We don't miss a trick that goes on! How many times have we've been asked "Do you have eyes in back of your head?" Why, yes I do. It's called a Mothers' Instinct!! I could tell just by the sounds what my kids were up to. And we know that when things are quiet, THAT'S time to worry!! 

Most of us don't have the time to be lazy! I know when my kids were little I ran here and there! I drove the husband to work, drove the kids to school. When my daughter started full-day kindergarten I went back to school. I also worked part-time here and there as well as taking classes at the local community college. I never sat still!

And even if you don't work and/or go to school, your days are full. Before I did all that, I spent most of the day cleaning. Then the kids came home from school and it was home work, getting dinner started. Then it was Cub Scouts. And dance class. And PTA. And on and on. Us moms never seem to sit still. 

We need to be vigilant in our relationships as well. We need to nurture our marriages and our friendships. We need to keep nurturing our relationship with Jesus. All of these things are important. All of these need daily attention, same as the attention we gave our kids. Make time every day to find the time to spend in the Word. It should be an important part of your day as it is making sure the kids get to school ok, get their homework done, and get to their activities.

A: I will admit, I have let my most important relationships flounder. My hubby and I got into a rut. I need to start developing friendships. And most importantly, I need to feed my faith by strengthening my relationship with Jesus. When I nurture that, then that will spill over in all my other relationships. 

Hubby and I go to a recovery group. It has been such a blessing to me because I found a great group of women with whom I can talk to, be friends with and find support from. One of our steps is that we will make time in our day to be in the Word. It is important. It will help keep us on track and give us comfort and guidance. It is God who will get us through the tough times and He will be there to rejoice with us in the good times. It is the most important relationship we can have!

P: Jesus, my Savior, Yours is the most important relationship I could ever have in my life. No matter what may be happening in my life, You are there every step of the way. You give me strength and comfort in the tough times. I sing and praise You in the good times. You give me all I need. When I have all that, it multiplies itself into all my other relationships. You guide me in all I do. I am so thankful for You! I am truly blessed! In Your Holy Name, Amen!